Since I've last posted I've failed to reach my summer reading goal by two books, written no sort of poetry, or prose, and have thought nothing of the program that I want to start within the next five years. This post isn't a pity post, it's more of a confessional. I've done everything that this blog was supposed to help me not to do. I've become a complacent and ordinary human being. That may be okay with some, but my closest friends and family will not allow that of me and I won't allow that of them. That's just the culture that we have built and maintained since as far back as I can remember. For that, I'm sorry and won't allow it to happen again.
I got the idea for this post while group chatting with a couple of my brothers. One of them challenged us by sending us a picture of him working on his goals. This afternoon he sent us another one that said, "grinding while you sleep." It was 12pm and I wasn't asleep, but I did feel the need to accept his challenge and match it, if not, raise the bar. This is something that we used to do all the time and have gotten away from, but that has to change.
A lot of people may think that I've reached my goals and they aren't wrong for thinking that. I've recently received my diploma and have been teaching (something I've always set out on doing) since September. Yes, that's great *pats self on the back*, but it's also become a problem for me. I've allowed my job to become an excuse instead of using it as motivation to work harder for other goals. Stress and tiredness are real, but they aren't excuses. My teaching career has gotten off to a great start and I wouldn't want to be doing anything else, as far as work goes, at this point in my life, but I'm not done. Teaching won't write my book for me and an early literacy program won't just spring from it either. It can be a big help, but it won't mean anything if I'm constantly in a mundane, I'm tired, woe is me sort of mood everyday when I get home from work.
So, this post is to tell you all that I'm back and ready to grind. I'm willing to lose sleep over getting what I want and what I know I'm on this earth to do. I am giving you all permission to call me out, and hold me accountable, if I don't post at least twice a month from here on out. I will also be starting my book very soon, so if I respond with a lame excuse, like being tired from teaching, that has nothing to do with writing/planning for my book, or literacy program, than tell me I'm lame or something insulting to light a fire under my butt again. This past week I've been working on a CNF (creative nonfiction) piece that I would like to share with you all within the next few days. It's transparent and involves things from my life and the life of people that I love that may be tough to read for some, but I had to do it for me. It's probably going to be the longest piece that I share on here for a while, with me starting my book soon, but the posts won't be spaced out months apart like this one and my last.
With that said, everyone keep grinding and remember that one goal being reached doesn't mean all goals are reached. My mom is in her fifties and is getting ready to start writing a book and thinking about going to school, so don't tell me that you can't make things happen! -- that one was for me to be honest. For those that want to keep me accountable, feel free to comment on my posts or email me - see.harris31@gmail.com
-See Harris
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